The Solo Night - A Mama Lifesaver

As humans we all need a break from the world. Time to check out, be on our own and take care of number one. This is especially true when you become a parent. You tend to feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you are always going, going going, and it is easy to forget to take care of yourself. To ensure that we are both well equipped to raise our tiny people in the best way possible Josh and I both take what we call a Solo Night once a week.

What the heck is a Solo Night you ask. In our house it is a designated night every week that we get all to ourselves. A Treat Yo Self Day! No kids, no spouse. Just me, myself and my bad TV. Josh takes Mondays every week and I take Wednesdays and we get to do with those nights (after work and dinner) whatever we want while the other one gets some 2 on 1 quality time with the kiddos.

Josh’s weekly solo night is never the same. Some Mondays he takes a nap, sometimes he watches movies or TV and sometimes he just plays whatever dumb game he is obsessed with that week on his phone for hours on end. However, for me my Wednesdays almost always look the same, I get the blog posted for you guys, wash my hair and then I plant myself in front of the TV for my weekly dose of whatever is on the DVR, most of the time while in my beloved bed. I try really hard not to pick up my phone unless I am mindlessly scrolling through social media or doing something equally as unproductive.

While I cherish all the time I can get with my boys, because time is an absolute thief, I am not ashamed to say that I look forward to Wednesdays every single week. Between having two kids under the age of two, a husband, a household and a full-time job, by mid-week I am normally a run-down mess. And in those four sweet, sweet hours I don’t have to worry, wipe butts, do bath time, clean up the food Rory has thrown everywhere or use my brain at all. And it is glorious. I always wake up on Thursday mornings feeling like a whole new person ready to take on the world.

You want to know the very best part of all of this? I don’t feel a shred of guilt about it. Josh and I both get our time so there is no worrying about him being overworked or resenting me. I still get to eat dinner with the babies and give them snuggles before they go to bed so I don’t have to have negative feelings about not seeing them. I work really hard during the rest of the week to ensure that by Wednesday all of my chores are done and that there is nothing on the to-do list that cannot wait. Mostly, when it is all said and done I get to be a better mama, wife and person because after my solo night I have regained my sanity and my self-control. At least for the next several days…

Allowing time for self-care is the best gift you can give to yourself and to your partner. Having any amount of time, big or small, to reconnect with yourself and to give your brain a mini stay-cation is so important in the fast paced world we live in. While for me this means shutting my brain down and watching my stories for you it could be going for a walk, reading a book, getting a massage, or perhaps you’re like Josh and sometimes you just really need a nap. It’s anything that makes you feel relaxed, at-ease and takes a little bit of weight off of those shoulders and completely guilt free. After all you cannot pour from an empty cup, and after my Wednesday Solo Night my cup runneth over.